This report has been written by CrabTreeBHA...

Like a Bat colliding with a Vehicle, I walked straight into a locked door and banged my knee, "Dumbass!" I said to myself and upon entering through the correct doorway I was met with the Receptionist barely containing her fits of laughter at my stupity...bitch!

After a few gentle rubs of the knee (not from the lady) I wandered upto the Chamber Of Horrors and took seat again in the Nimby section as I cant be arsed to sit next to someone I don't know, Martin Perry was in the dock...I've since renamed him Pezza for fun value (what?)

It was all about the cost of stadiums at the various sites, the NIMBY attacking scum (Mr White) was throwing questions to Pezza left, right and centre. It appears that the THV owners would lease out the stadium to BHA but not any other land, if BHA wanted to add a Business park for example then they would have to pay shitloads for the privilege and BHA would laso have to fund and create a Fully Serviced Access area...think this may mean a Road! Pezza added that the owners "would not permit any other use" without a cash sum, Mr Styles is the owners name unless I am mistaken.

It was then I caught the Inspector looking at me, I think he may of been Intimidated by my clean shaven head, either that or he'd been to the Madejski Stadium.....nah it was my Hooligan appearance!

After more questions and deliberations the Pezmeister was starting to get pissed off with this NIMBY, you tell that from his actions and Signs of "For Fuck SAKE!" every minute or so. They disagreed about the Percentage of Contingency Plans for various things, all abit over my head as they threw sums at each other like a Tennis Match. I think the NIMBY won that set but wasn't too sure.

The NIMBY White then went on to compare stuff to Hull Citys ground, Pezza (probably for the millionth time in the Inquiry already) stated that "No two stadiums are alike", I was waiting for the Ashburton Grove card to be played but the NIMBY kept it to his chest.

Abit more argy-bargy and up stepped the ever faithful Mr Hopkins representing the NIMBY/LDC side, he looks and really is a class A Twat. Things were mentioned when a sudden hush fell over the place and the only thing to be heard was Mr Clay (representing the Good Guys) mumbling along to himself, probably a cunning plan of how to get into his secretarys knickers...at least thats what I was thinking about!

Pezza started to go on about how BHA had added Basic Costs, External Costs & Infrastructure Costs into one Lump Amount, Hopkins then started to argue that if you take out the Infrastructure costs you get closer to affordability...DUH!

Pezza then pointed out that Falmer & Sheepcote were similar in Cost but THV was different due to the Scope of Works at issue and not the cost, figures were said but my pen fell on the floor...DOH!

Hopkins seems to be pushing the Shoreham sites (Airport/Port/Cement) more than the others, as discussions about Car/Bus/Coach Parks began, Pezza said that 1474 Car Spaces was the absolute minimum for a stadium and that 10,000sq foot was going to be used at Falmer for Coach Park but 18,000 at other sites, mainly because the Falmer Coach park had moved in the plans to the North Side of Village Way from the South Side.
It moved onto THV where Pezza claimed that a 2nd roundabout was needed and that would push costs up, Hopkins didn't seem to grasp this concept and kept banging on about lower costs only for Pezza to remind him about the 2nd roundabout...unfortunately no Swings would be added.

Hopkins then came out with another Gem, he wanted to know why BHA hasn't given cost of Falmer Coach/Bus/Car Park areas but they have for the other sites, Pezza, pissed off even more explained that this Inquiry was about the other sites NOT about Falmer, the Inspector nodded his head!

Coffee break...long one this time, how Lord B gets a whole day into 8 paragraphs I'll never know!......mmmm coffee rush......

Falmer would be used with Falmer High School and the Uni for Education, Skills Training & Employment areas (which is all could), Pezza went onto explain how Falmer Site would become a Community Stadium not just a football ground - with this he compared it to the other sites which would not be able to have this as relative funding would not be available, apart from Sheepcote. Here the College Of Media Arts (which is set to close and be bought out by the City College) could be used but the plans conflicted that of a Stadium Site but it could be possible. Apparently for every Child at school you need a certain amount of space for a building (Library for example) before funding Help can come into play, Falmer has this all set and Sheepcote to a degree.

Hopkins then went on about Shared Development at other clubs (SAKE), Pezza said that Other sites were not an option in this area as the Shoreham Harbour owners wont sell and asking the Port of a bit more space was not an option, Airport owners wont sell and the Cement owners, who would give Albion the land for free, wanted a Fully Serviced Site - sort of a Goodwill gesture from us to provide that as we get the land for zilch.

It then went onto acquiring Land from Councils to buy land, Brighton Council "could" get THV but at a cost, Pezza explained that Adur council wouldn't want to get land at the Airport for someone else...fair point!

At this point the Inspector called lunch and I waved goodbye to the Inquiry & Mr Clays assistant for the final time. I only wish I could get to the Closing Submission days (when everything is finally reviewed) but alas I begin life as a Lawn Care Operative on Monday, far away from a Desk, Computer & unfortunately NSP/NSC.

I hope you enjoyed my Inquiry posts (sorry if they are abit long winded), they are seen through a novices eyes and I advise anyone to get along to the Inquiry of they can, I've left with a positive attitude that Falmer really IS the only site but I've only been three hours of the 5-6 week long process.....but at least in my heart I believe we are on course for a YES!